As a child, I grew up in two homes. One of which was plagued by child abuse and domestic violence against women. The other was a wholesome home, in which morality and kindness were stressed. I frequented both homes, the violent and volatile on Tuesdays, Thursdays and every other weekend. So, inevitably, growing up, I was a frequent victim of abuse at the hands of my father. Having the ability to go back to a "good" home gave me the gift of recognizing from a very early age what was right and wrong on a moral level. This was only magnified by the childhood adversities I confronted until I was fourteen. When I was fourteen a few things happened that directly influenced everything pertaining to my life and work. My father was arrested, my grandfather (a man that filled in the void my father never filled) died, and I became religious. In religion, I found a temporary escape which enabled me to find art, it enhanced my views on morality, and most importantly, it gave me an insatiable spirituality.
I am highly in tune with the historical process in which I create my paintings and artwork. I begin by painting the canvas black and slowly pulling out the light. This process is extremely important to the meaning of the work. Dark can represent many things, for me they are evil, moral bankruptcy, and my father. So by painting the surface totally dark, I am acknowledging this evil and immorality that surrounds me. However, as we all do, in each painting, and each experience, I begin to find my own sense of light, my own sense of G-d as I push through the darkness of the painting. In these paintings light is representative of the good, G-d, love, and my mother. And so, in each painting, I have to essentially re-discover and evaluate the light and all of its implications. Even in all of the darkness, the light always prevails.
In my work, I tend to focus on a few key topics that I touched on above; faith, mortality, morality and lineage. All of these things stem out of my experiences as a child and as an adult and so my work begins to represent my life. Through these representations, I gain a higher understanding of myself and my relationship with G-d, as well as a sort of catharsis. I find peace of mind in the details of painting. Creating these works has, and I hope continues to be, an act of meditation, self-exploration, piety and prayer.